I'll Give Birth Anywhere

I'll Give Birth Anywhere

I'll Give Birth Anywhere

By Colleen Tolliver
November 15, 2006 | Issue 42•46



Pregnant women today make me sick. With all their whining about maternity leave and pregnancy accommodations, it's no wonder women aren't respected in the workplace—so choosy about where and when they will have a baby. Not me.

I'm a working woman with a busy schedule, but as far as I'm concerned, childbirth is about the experience, not the location. I couldn't be more willing to give birth in the backseat of a speeding taxi, in an elevator stuck between floors, or on an airplane bound for Chicago. No emergency landings necessary, just give me a pillow and an aisle seat and Plooosh! I'll pop that sucker out before we hit cruising altitude.

Slap it, snip it, and pass the pretzels, thank you very much.

The miracle of life doesn't always come in a convenient birthing suite with a bunch of doctors and expensive, sterile equipment. Sometimes it occurs in the midst of empty boxes in the storeroom of a major department store and you just have to roll with the punches, like I did with my daughter Macy. I'd do it all again too, if I were welcome back at that particular mall. Truth be told, part of me wants to feel my cervix dilate to 10 centimeters in a Banana Republic. Upscale.

Maybe it's just my maternal instinct talking, but I wouldn't think twice about giving birth in the back of a freezer truck delivering frozen peas to Montana.

Heck, I'm hard-pressed to come up with somewhere I wouldn't expel an infant from my uterus. Sure I'd like it if my mother were there, but if she doesn't happen to be by my side when my water breaks courtside during the playoffs at the Garden, then so be it. Life is too precious to deny just because I don't feel "comfortable" in a particular Arby's restroom.

Childbirth is a gift from God, whether it happens in a hotel lobby or a gyroscope. And I should know. I've done both.

I know the "norm" is to have your children in some stuffy maternity ward, but I guess I just don't see what all the fuss is about. It seems like so much work to go to the hospital, sign in, and get hooked up to a fetal monitor—who's got the time?

I'm not going to turn into one of those women who calls up her doctor as soon as her contractions start coming every two minutes. I may be pregnant, but I've got a life to live and that means being flexible with the location of my blessed event.

Step out of the line for Space Mountain just because the baby's crowning? Fat chance! My baby will be brought into the world in total darkness in the middle of a loop-de-loop and he or she will be grateful for it.

We're talking about childbirth here, not rocket science. If you can't pull off Cesarean section without running to some bozo with an obstetrics license then you don't deserve to call yourself a mother. My girlfriends talk about their "alternative" deliveries like they deserve a medal. Water birth? Try hot-tub birth with the starting lineup of Philadelphia Flyers and then come talk to me. I'd give birth to twins while waterskiing behind the Staten Island Ferry. No sweat. Who's got the placenta?

So have fun with your stirrups and ice chips. I'll be thinking of you when some production assistant's cleaning up the afterbirth during a coast-to-coast feed of Larry King Live.

I don't need paid time away from work to bear my kids. All I need is a partially empty conference room and an intern who can think on her feet. You'd be surprised how nicely a laptop perches on top of a slowly deflating womb, whether in the office or commuting on the subway. And with these new hands-free phones, I don't even need to miss a call when I'm cutting the umbilical cord.

"Can I put you on hold for a sec? Hello? It's a boy!"

And you know what? If I decide not to have my next child, I will terminate the pregnancy whenever and wherever I choose.




Okay, that article is HYSTERICAL....until the last sentence, of course. Interesting that she can say that, "childbirth is a gift from God" and then later speak of killing her child if she "chooses." Notice that she actually called it a "child"...is killing children legal??? Apparently killing children is not legal outside the womb....but because a child is inside...it makes a difference???? Insanity.

Another needless rise in C-sections

*sigh*
Another rise in the national C-section rate. Sadly enough, the rate for premature and low birth weight babies has risen as well.
Where are all these babies we are "saving" by performing a cesarean section?!?!?!
Below is a copy from this link:
http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/products/
pubs/pubd/hestats/prelimbirths05/prelimbirths05.htm


"The preliminary rate of cesarean delivery rose 4 percent in 2005 to 30.2 percent of all births, another record high for the Nation (Table 4). The cesarean rate declined somewhat during the early and mid-1990s, but has risen 46 percent since 1996 (from 20.7 percent)."

When will the insanity stop?!

Fetal injury more common than expected with cesarean delivery

Is this "okay?" Is it "okay" with us that this amount (albeit small, but still, 1.1%...around 2,600 babies per year) of babies are injured in a C section? What if these injuries were common in homebirths? Would there be a public outcry to halt homebirths?
If these "needed" C sections were saving lives....if they were saving moms and babies from death, then I can imagine justification for all the birth injuries (and increased maternal death). However, research shows that the increase in C sections has NOT resulted in a better maternal or baby outcome. No less babies dying. No less moms dying.
Again....madness. And "we" allow it. We promote it. We turn our heads when a C section happens outside of an emergency. ("failure to progress...or perform"..."CPD".) What will it take for women to stand up and demand better care??? Studies THIS YEAR have shown us that a mom triples her chance of death by having this surgery....and that babies are injured more often than in a regular birth. What else does it take?

Below is an article from an OBGYN forum I am on. It is from "them"....not us. :)



Fetal injury more common than expected with cesarean delivery
Source: Obstetrics & Gynecology 2006; 108: 885-90

Documenting the incidence of fetal injury in women undergoing cesarean delivery.

Women undergoing cesarean section should be counseled that fetal injury during the procedure is rare, but still occurs at a rate of 1.1 percent, researchers suggest.

James Alexander, from the University of Southwestern Medical Center in Dallas, Texas, USA, and co-base this recommendation on the results of their study in which they recorded the incidence and type of fetal injury in 37,110 women undergoing cesarean delivery.

Of these deliveries, 418 (1.1 percent) had an identified fetal injury, the most common of which was skin laceration, found in 272 (0.7 percent) babies.

The team also discovered that cephalohematoma was present in 88 infants, and that clavicular failure, brachial plexus injury, skull fracture, and facial nerve palsy were relatively common complications of cesarean section, each found in about 10 babies.

These observations suggest that "cesarean delivery does not, in and of itself, prevent major birth trauma," the authors write.

"Although cesarean delivery may play a role in decreasing birth trauma in certain clinical circumstances, it does not eliminate its occurrence," they conclude.

Posted: 19 October 2006

© Current Medicine Group 2006

Technology-Intensive Childbirth

"Technology-Intensive Childbirth Is the Norm for Great Majority of Primarily Healthy Women"


4 in 10 labors were started artificially.
1 in 3 ladies have a C section.

This is madness.


http://www.marketwire.com/mw/release_html_b1?release_id=175714

Real Beauty

Below is a link to a short video that Dove put together in a campaign for REAL beauty. It is good to watch to realize what goes into the making of a "model."
Although I do NOT agree with the worldly push towards a "high self esteem" (completely un-Biblical) I do think this is a good clip to watch.





http://www.campaignforrealbeauty.ca/film_fullscreen_evo.html

What's in a Flu Shot?

Before you get your next (bird) flu shot, watch this short video and make sure it's something you really think you need. hysterical!

Udder Feeding

C-section triples moms chance of death

Can I just say, "DUH" before anyone reads this article on this link?!

It states that having a C-section TRIPLES the chance of a mom dying in childbirth...and this is a medical study, not from my tree-hugging midwifery today magazine. :)

Let's see here....

giving birth as God intended and created us to...
or
having major abdominal surgery to have a baby....

and they are shocked at this finding???

And I am SO sure that the doctors are showing moms this study so the mom can make a wise choice for her birth.....yeah.

For the love of Pete.





http://www.medpagetoday.com/OBGYN/Pregnancy/tb/4022

THE "NEW MIRANDA RIGHTS" FOR PARENTS

This list of rights is for those who choose to send their children off to be indoctrinated by the state.
Enjoy!



Parent or legal guardian; As you enroll your child in our government system of state indoctrination we are required to inform you of your rights...



You have the right to remain silent. Do you understand?



Everything you say and do will be ignored anyway. So don't waste your breath. Do you understand?



You have the right to an attorney. But don't waste your money either. Most judges are on our side. They know how they got elected or appointed. Long live the NEA! Do you understand?



You have no right to due process or privacy. Just bake cookies (no nuts please!) and attend the PTO meetings and we'll get along just fine. Do you understand?



You have no right to object to any material we present to your child. Everything we teach is pursuant to legitimate educational as well as health and welfare interests of the state. Do you understand?



We will use the full power of the court to establish that the interests of the state are more important than your interest as a parent. All at taxpayer expense. (That means you.) Do you understand?



We realize that it may seem awkward to give up control of your child's education. But think about how many more hours in the day you will now be free to pursue your own interests. More importantly, the state is now free teach your child exactly what he needs to do to be a good worker in the global economy.



Congratulations! You have just been liberated from your primary obligation as a parent.



Go in peace.

A “Cross-Eyed” View of Biblical Femininity

A “Cross-Eyed” View of Biblical Femininity
By Sheree Jacob
June 23, 2006

Woman was God’s idea - His divine creation. From the foundation of the world, God intended man to be fully male and woman to be fully female in order that together they would reflect His image. We are called to be joyfully confident in who we are before God, not based on temporary cultural norms, but founded on permanent facts of creation. John Piper says of God’s intention before the fall: “This is the way God meant it to be before there was any sin in the world: sinless man, full of love, in his tender, strong leadership in relation to woman; and sinless woman, full of love, in her joyful, responsive support for man’s leadership.” Mature femininity isn’t what sin or popular opinion makes of it, but what God willed for it at its best, both in a broad spectrum and as it specifically applies to individuals.

In general, femininity and what it entails has been drowned in a sea of worldly definitions and disdained and neglected with the rise of Feminism. One secular feminist represents the world’s crude view by defining femininity as “…a nostalgic tradition of imposed limitations.” Culture erases the lines of femininity in the name of equality and personal rights. Nearly lost, the beautiful treasure of God’s way of thinking on this subject desperately needs to be recovered. Born feminine because we were created feminine, our understanding of why roles as male and female matter, and what beauty consists of, should flow from a heart bound to the gospel.

What, exactly, is tied up in that word “femininity”? What does it mean to be “biblically feminine”? In order to fully grasp femininity, it’s necessary to have a proper knowledge and recognition of biblical masculinity, for you cannot have the one without the other. Adequately identified by John Piper, “At the heart of mature masculinity is a sense of benevolent responsibility to lead, provide for and protect women in ways appropriate to a man’s differing relationships.” On the flip side, “At the heart of mature femininity is a freeing disposition to affirm, receive and nurture strength and leadership from worthy men in ways appropriate to a woman’s differing relationships.” Dating back to that fateful day in the lush Garden of Eden, feminism’s rebellion was planted by Eve’s refusal to be content with the status quo. By fearing that God didn’t really have her best interests in mind, Eve believed that obedience would exact too high a price. She defied God’s commands. Found instilled in the sinful hearts of women today, Eve’s neglect of God’s ordination has carried through in full-potency. In Titus 2:3-5, there are listed seven virtues of femininity according to God’s calling: loving your husband, loving your children, self-control, purity, working at home, kindness, and submission in marriage. Femininity does not equal being quiet and wearing dresses. Found in God’s calling from the day He created woman, it emanates a heart fully receptive of His plan and expresses itself in the ways He established.

Created fully equal in God’s sight yet with uniquely different roles, male and female were not to be duplicates, but compliments. “Then the Lord God said, ‘It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him’”(Genesis 2:18). Adam didn’t complain of or acknowledge a lack; God declared his aloneness as not good. Douglas Wilson says of God’s intervention: “The man needs the help; the woman needs to help. He is oriented to the task and she is oriented to him.” To lead, provide for and protect is a man’s calling. As defined in the Random House Dictionary, to “lead” is “to guide in direction, course, action, opinion; to command or direct.” In marriage, coming alongside her husband and helping him in the task God’s given him is a woman’s calling, along with loving and raising the next generation. “Help” is defined as “to contribute strength or means to, render assistance to, cooperate effectively with; aid, assist.” The dictionary goes on to say, “Help implies furnishing anything that furthers another’s efforts or relieves his wants or necessities.” Creatively, God intended for masculine weaknesses to emphasize and call forth woman’s strengths, and for feminine weaknesses to highlight and beckon man’s strengths. Each is the perfect compliment that brings to light the strengths in each other. With a disposition to yield to authority and an inclination to follow leadership, women are to exemplify submission. God calls men to exercise loving, gentle, considerate headship and women to submit to that headship in a willing, gentle, respectful way. Woman’s highest calling, her very nature from creation, is to be a helpmate reflecting Christ who came “not to be served, but to serve.”(Matthew 20:28)

As the first generation actually expecting to find happiness in this temporary life on earth, we have sought fulfillment in many things. But perhaps one of the most driving forces is a never-ceasing quest for beauty. Patterned throughout history, women have gone after beauty with a headlong fury, going to ultimate extremes and doing whatever it takes. God has instilled in us an innate desire to look attractive. It’s natural! But today’s media blares a beauty-defining image that is a false standard and a counterfeit message of beauty. In 1 Peter 3:3-4 we find God’s definition of true beauty standing in stark contrast to the definitions of our culture. “Do not let your adorning be external – the braiding of hair, the wearing of gold, or the putting on of clothing – but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God’s sight is very precious.” He calls for something precious. He treasures something worthy. Beauty by cultural standards is merely skin deep and swiftly fading, but God is after the heart; a beauty that will not fade but only grow and deepen as time goes on. “Man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7). Godly inner-beauty greatly impacts lives and has a lasting effect, while worldly beauty may turn some heads for a brief, momentary impression. Though it stands as a great mystery, inward beauty is puzzlingly evident outwardly, for it is powerful, permanent, eternal, and ultimately damage-resistant. As a sign of surrendered trust, this gentle and quiet spirit that God cherishes understands and acknowledges that God is fully in control. It certainly doesn’t mean being passive or listless, but it isn’t rude, pushy, or harsh. Reflecting what is being cultivated in the heart, appearance either echoes a commitment to Christ or hints at a clinging to the world. Amazingly, we house the Holy Spirit in our very bodies. They are not our own, so we are commanded to honor God with our bodies! Physical beauty, in the end, never delivers as advertised, for “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.” (Proverbs 31:30).

According to God’s objective, femininity is far more than just acting feminine, but it is a disposition that seeks to find joy in the honored role as a helper. Truly beautiful in God’s eyes and impacting on others, it exemplifies gentleness and surrender to God. Ultimately, the main reason for pursuing biblical femininity is the incredible gospel of Jesus Christ, for our behavior has the power to either discredit or to commend the gospel.

Singleness is a season that is swiftly passing away. It is a gift! Created purposefully by God to live purposefully by His Word, God calls me as a single woman to discover how biblical femininity specifically applies to me in this season. “And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.” (1Corinthians 7:34-35) In a sense, this is a time of freedom! During this period, there are unique ways I can express biblical femininity, develop my role as helpmate, and seek after that which is essentially beautiful.

Since femininity is a disposition which characterizes the heart, it is not simply a reflex ensued by marriage. In all my relationships as a single, I can seek the Holy Spirit’s guidance to apply a biblical vision of manhood and womanhood and develop a method and demeanor that justifies the God-given unique role of man as leader. God calls us to respond to all those around us as true women of God. Obviously, this is not expressed in the exact same way to all men, but in some shape or form in all my relationships with men. Taking advantage of my dad’s wisdom, I should seek his insight and value his headship over me. By submitting to him, I will learn to respect and defer to a man’s godly leadership. Even though it may appear that single men are unaware of their inerrant need for woman, God is aware! Remembering this truth will protect me from bitterness, complaining, or manipulation – all characters which tarnish the gleam of femininity. If the home is to be my primary place for ministry, isn’t now the time to cultivate a heart for the home? One way to express my femininity is to take an interest in, care for, and reach out to others’ children. Learning from my mom, I can glean much from the great deposit of wisdom and experience God has given her as she has faithfully lived out her calling as wife and mother. To express my femininity currently, I should utilize any chance or opportunity to learn and grow.

Continuously, I need to cultivate a habit of encouraging and making room for godly men to practice servant leadership in my life. Instead of being tempted to resist them in a stiff-necked posture of heart, I should incline toward them. Publicly questioning or sinfully complaining about their actions should be purposefully avoided. If ever it appears that I should attempt to influence a man’s decision or behavior, undeniably it should be done in a way that signals my full support of his leadership. When my heart is soft to the mercies of God and overwhelmed by His love, obedience will be a cheerful sacrifice of gratitude. Not only am I to receive, but I am to nurture and strengthen the resources of masculinity that God has placed in my life. Gladly accepting gentlemanly courtesies respects their kind of strengths. We can pursue righteousness as brothers and sisters side-by-side. Through relationships with godly, worthy men, I can seek ways that enhance my God-given role as companion and helper.

“Present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God.” (Romans 12:1) Resolved that I only have one person to please as a single woman, I need to make the Lord the object of my pursuit for beauty. All should be for the eyes of One! God is not going to bless vain pursuits, so I need to replace them with godly ones. Based in the confidence of God’s loving care, Fatherly protection, and irrefutable kindness, a gentle and quiet spirit believes that God is going to be good. Oh that I might reach that place of gentleness that is humbly still in the face of God’s gracious disposal. Worldly passions will utterly mar my beauty. Pursuing thinness solely for the sake of thinness does not honor God; it is self-love and idolatry. Instead, I should develop self-control and strengthen my body for effective service to the Lord. But in order to have any hope of reaching that place, God, by His grace, must purify my motives. Abandoning divided loyalties and idols, I must devote myself wholly to be pure. Consequently, I will find the wonderful hope and freedom by being set free from an idolatrous self-focus. Am I consumed with ministering to others and glorifying God, or with what I see in the mirror? I must refuse to let my perception of that reflection dictate my state of peace and joy. “So whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God.” (1 Corinthians 10:31) Recognizing this body is not my own will radically affect how I take care of it. Gratefully receive God’s design. Praise Him for my body. Know it’s for His glory.

Without concerns or distractions, I want to maximize these single years in unhindered devotion to God. From a right understanding of biblical femininity to properly valuing and nurturing godly leadership of men in my life, I can, by God’s grace, seek to develop that mysteriously breathtaking beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit. Christ is able to make me a woman that defines myself only in Him and His truths, and trusts Him so much that I will do anything for His glory. This unique opportunity of singleness is mine to seize, or mine to squander.

Ever living in the presence of glory, the true woman reflects God’s image in every relationship and circumstance of life. Just as Moses radiated God’s glory after his close encounter with God’s power on Mount Sinai, if we are filled with the living spirit of God, we will radiate His beauty and make the gospel believable. In all behavior we are to adorn the gospel, because our actions will either bring honor to the one, true God, or misrepresent and tarnish His truth. I long to be that polished gold setting that uniquely displays the brilliance of a priceless gem – the Pearl of great price: the gospel. Originating at the cross, having an eternal perspective will free me from things passing away in order that I might eagerly pursue that which will last forever. “All that pleases is but for a moment, all that grieves is but for a moment; nothing is important but that which is eternal.” (Author unknown). Amid a generation that has recklessly abandoned the roots of manhood and womanhood divinely instilled at creation, I must develop a wartime mentality and lifestyle that has a “cross-eyed” view of God’s vision for biblical femininity.

Fried Chicken & The Pope

After watching sales falling off for three straight months at Kentucky Fried Chicken, the Colonel calls up the Pope and asks for a favor. The Pope says, "What can I do?"

The Colonel says, "I need you to change the daily prayer from, 'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'Give us this day our daily chicken'. If you do it, I'll donate 10 Million Dollars to the Vatican."

The Pope replies, "I am sorry. That is the Lord's prayer and I can not change the words." So the Colonel hangs up. After another month of dismal sales, the Colonel panics, and calls again.

"Listen your Excellency. I really need your help. I'll donate $50 million dollars if you change the words of the daily prayer from 'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'Give us this day our daily chicken.'" And the Pope responds, "It is very tempting, Colonel Sanders. The church could do a lot of good with that much money. It would help us to support many charities. But, again, I must decline. It is the Lord's prayer, and I can't change the words."

So the Colonel gives up again. After two more months of terrible sales. The Colonel gets desperate. "This is my final offer, your Excellency. If you change the words of the daily prayer from, 'Give us this day our daily bread' to 'Give us this day our daily chicken' I will donate $100 million to the Vatican."

The Pope replies, "Let me get back to you."

So the next day, the Pope calls together all of his bishops and he says, "I have some good news and I have some bad news. The good news is that KFC is going to donate $100 million to the Vatican." The bishops rejoice at the news. Then one asks about the bad news. The Pope replies, "The bad news is that we lost the Wonder Bread account."

Why I Chose NOT To Use A Carseat

*WHY I CHOOSE NOT TO USE A CAR SEAT*
Author unknown

I refuse to feel guilty for making an educated choice to not put my baby in
a car seat. There are so many militant car seat users in our society and I
am tired of them pushing their beliefs on me. There are lots of reasons I
have made this choice. First of all, I want my husband to be able to drive
him around in his car. He can just sit him on his lap when they go for a
ride. This will help him bond and be closer with our son. I don't want to be
the only one that drives him around. It makes my husband, mother and friends
feel special when they can take him for rides. I will be returning to work in 6 weeks and
I don't want a big old car seat in the back of our luxury car. I never put
my first son in a car seat and he is just fine. I was never in a car seat,
neither was my mother and we are both as healthy as can be. On the other
hand, my sister in law's cousin used a car seat and her child was seriously
injured in a car wreck. My aunt tried to use a car seat and wasn't able to.
She was never able to latch the baby in the seat properly. In fact, my car
is too small for a car seat anyway. What matters most is that my baby is healthy and happy.
When I left the hospital, they told me that I should try to use the car
seat, but if it didn't work out that it was all right to not use it. In
fact, in the diaper bag that I received from the hospital, it has some
information for how to safely ride in the car with my son without a car
seat. I tried for 1 week to use a car seat with my first son and it made
both of us miserable. I told my pediatrician about it, and he said it would
probably be best to not use a car seat anymore. Now he is happy and content
sitting on my lap as we drive. Using a car seat is just so inconvenient! My
privacy is also an issue. Do I want everyone to know when they see my car
that I have a child??? Besides, my children need to learn how to ride in the
car without being in the car seat. I don't want a 3 year old still wanting
to get in his seat! I know that using a car seat has some benefits, but
there are a lot of people out there who don't use them and their kids are
just fine! There are people out there that cannot use a car seat (can't
latch baby in properly, car is too small, doesn't match with the interior).
Using a car seat is a personal choice and nobody's business. As a parent I
have made the decision for what is best for my child. It works best for us
and our child.....and that is all that is important. It's my choice after
all, isn't it??

For all you morons out there, this is a poke at Moms that chose not to breastfeed.....get it????

Baby Got Book

Okay....I can see I am going to get TONS of flack about this next link...but I had to do it.

Warning:
I do not condone nor recommend anyone watching this video....but in case you do not head my warning, it is hysterical if you know the original "Baby Got Back"




http://www.whiteboydj.com/babygotbook.html

Click on the link and then push the play button...make sure you can hear the volume, but not to loud...Especially if you are at work! Although everyone will see you dancing anyway....

Cesarean Birth

I have a sweet friend who had her #2 C-section last summer. She desperately wanted a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) and she tried her darndest to accomplish that (believe me!!!!!)....but for some reason it did not work out.
She had put together a slideshow of moms that she knows that had had between 1-4 C's...and all who wanted a VBAC. The show is their pregnancies, labors, cesarean births and beautiful babies.

Please read what this mom has to say, and then watch her slideshow. It is a way for her (all the moms) to process their births and heal their empty hearts.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PIFNemQfe3s

"Yesterday was Liam's birthday and the 3rd anniversary
of my 1st c-section. I still have a hard time
separating the two from each other. One of the
happiest days of my life, one of the worst days of my
life.

As a sort of cathartic project I put together a
slideshow that kind of depicts how I feel about it.
Whenever I listened to the song that is playing on the
slideshow, it would immediately bring me back to my
labor... the lyrics are so fitting about how I feel
about it all.

Empty by the Cranberries

"Something has left my life,
And I don't know where it went to.
Somebody caused me strife,
And it's not what I was seeking.

Didn't you see me, didn't you hear me?
Didn't you see me standing there?
Why did you turn out the lights?
Did you know that I was sleeping?

Say a prayer for me,
Help me to feel the strength I did.
My identity, has it been taken?
Is my heart breaking on me?

All my plans fell through my hands,
They fell through my hands on me.
All my dreams it suddenly seems,
It suddenly seems,
Empty"

My long hard labors ended in "emptiness"... what
should have just been an empty belly became an empty
heart, an empty woman. A feeling of incompleteness.
This slideshow depicts the whole of my experience, the
big hole of my experience.

The pictures are a mix of my labor pics and those
donated by CBAC moms- those who tried for a VBAC and
had it end in another cesarean. It is so
heartwrenching seeing all these moms laboring at home-
going for an HBAC- and having it end in a second (or
fourth in one case!) unwanted cesarean. There is a
smattering of pictures from some moms' first CS in
there as well.

Anyway, I was reading on your blog that your first
child's birthday was recently... and how c-section
could have been in your birth history... so I thought
you might "get" this... "

Pro Breastfeeding TV commercial

Go to Dr Jay Gordon's website (below) and click on the 20/20 story (scroll down a bit on the right side) about the Pro-Breastfeeding TV ads that were pulled off the air. C-R-A-Z-Y
What is wrong with these people?????????????????????????????????????? SO WHAT if the formula companies are going to lose money....GOOD FOR THEM.
ARG......


http://www.drjaygordon.com/development/index.asp#

Heads of State as Women

Dr Phil

I rarely watch TV....and even more rare is me watching a Dr Phil show or an Oprah show....however, it seems that when I do have a lazy afternoon and I flip on the TV and watch one of those shows I am BLOWN AWAY by the stupidity of people! It is so sad to me how awful people can act and treat others and it be considered "okay".

SO today Dr Phil had a guy on his show that was protesting his being forced into fatherhood and all that entails ($500 per month in child support). This guy (I hesitate to use the word Dad or Father) was in a law suit over the fact that he, as a man, is not given the same choices a woman is given when she does not want to become a parent. He says he should not be forced into caring for a child he "accidentally" created and does not want. Do I even need to go into this subject? I mean PLEASE....if you have sex, there is ALWAYS the possibility of conceiving a child. I have done numerous births for moms who have been VERY careful and VERY protected and yet they are pushing out a baby. (ummm....isn't God in control of that anyway?????????). So for him to say he did not make that choice is insane. He says that the mom could have aborted the child, put the child up for adoption or abandoned the child and society would have been fine with that.....but he as the biological father has no choice as to what to do with the child and if he wants to support that child or not. Well, shall we break this down? Okay! :)

God did not intend for us to have sex outside of the marriage relationship. If they had obeyed the rules they would not ever have to worry about having a baby.

Birth control is NEVER 100%. This particular mom was on the Pill. As stated before, I have done births for moms who have been on the pill, used a prophylactic, had an IUD, been on depo, had their tubes tied, had a hubby with a vasectomy.....etc. If you are having sex you are saying you are willing to have a child.

Just because the law states that something is okay does NOT mean that in the eyes of the Lord it is okay. A woman's "choice"of having an abortion is not a choice, it is murder. Just because she technically can lawfully decided to have her child sucked down a sink does not make it right. SO her ability of being able to dispose of a baby does not make it okay for him (the dad) to not take care of the baby he has helped create. (that is this mans argument)

So later in the broadcast I saw a dad who is wanting to have more kids even though the mom is NOT wanting anymore...and a dad who is on strike (on his roof) till his wife gives in and gets the baby out of their room (no kidding). WHAT IS WRONG WITH THESE GUYS? It sounds to me like they are being extremely selfish and really only care about themselves and what THEY want. The heart of this issue is pride, arrogance and selfishness. Not that all the moms are 100% correct (except in the baby in the bed thing....HELLOOOOOO....it is proven to be better for the baby to be with mom in the early months than in his/her own crib alone). It sounds to me like these couples have an underling problem here that effects the parenting relationship.....and they need to get that taken care of before anything else going to get any better.

So does this mean that everyday on every Dr Phil show they have some idiot on there who is a jerk...and Dr Phil has to try and sort it out? Poor Dr Phil.

A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a rabbi

A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a rabbi all served as chaplains to students of a university. They would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk shop.

One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear and convert it to their faith. One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment.

They would all go out into the woods where each would find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it.

Seven days later, they're all together in the hospital to discuss their experiences. Father Flannery, who has his arm in a sling, is on crutches, and has various bandages, goes first."Well," he says, "I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation."

Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with an arm and both legs in casts, and had an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he claimed, "WELL brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising Jesus."

They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors running in and out of him. He was in bad shape. The rabbi looks up and says, "Looking back on it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start."

Breast-Feed or Else

In today's New York Times.

Breast-Feed or Else

By RONI RABIN

There is no black-box label like that affixed to cans of infant formula or tucked into the corner of magazine advertisements, at least not yet. But that is the unambiguous message of a controversial government public health campaign encouraging new mothers to breast-feed for six months to protect their babies from colds, flu, ear infections, diarrhea and even obesity. In April, the World Health Organization, setting new international bench marks for children's growth, for the first time referred to breast-feeding as the biological norm.

"Just like it's risky to smoke during pregnancy, it's risky not to breast-feed after," said Suzanne Haynes, senior scientific adviser to the Office on Women's Health in the Department of Health and Human Services. "The whole notion of talking about risk is new in this field, but it's the only field of public health, except perhaps physical activity, where there is never talk about the risk."
A two-year national breast-feeding awareness campaign that culminated this spring ran television announcements showing a pregnant woman clutching her belly as she was thrown off a mechanical bull during ladies' night at a bar — and compared the behavior to failing to breast-feed.

"You wouldn't take risks before your baby's born," the advertisement says. "Why start after?"

Senator Tom Harkin, Democrat of Iowa, has proposed requiring warning labels, on cans of infant formula and in advertisements, similar to the those on cigarettes. They would say that the Department of Health and Human services has determined that "breast-feeding is the ideal method of feeding and nurturing infants" or that "breast milk is more beneficial to infants than infant formula."

Child-rearing experts have long pointed to the benefits of breast-feeding. But critics say the new campaign has taken things too far and will make mothers who cannot breast-feed, or choose not to, feel guilty and inadequate.

"I desperately wanted to breast-feed," said Karen Petrone, an associate professor of history at University of Kentucky in Lexington.
When her two babies failed to gain weight and her pediatrician insisted that she supplement her breast milk with formula, Ms. Petrone said, "I felt so guilty."
"I thought I was doing something wrong," she added. "Nobody ever told me that some women just can't produce enough milk."

Moreover, urging women to breast-feed exclusively is a tall order in a country where more than 60 percent of mothers of very young children work, federal law requires large companies to provide only 12 weeks' unpaid maternity leave and lactation leave is unheard of. Only a third of large companies provide a private, secure area where women can express breast milk during the workday, and only 7 percent offer on-site or near-site child care, according to a 2005 national study of employers by the nonprofit Families and Work Institute.
"I'm concerned about the guilt that mothers will feel," said Ellen Galinsky, president of the center. "It's hard enough going back to work."

Public health leaders say the weight of the scientific evidence for breast-feeding has grown so overwhelming that it is appropriate to recast their message to make clear that it is risky not to breast-feed. Ample scientific evidence supports the contention that breast-fed babies are less vulnerable to acute infectious diseases, including respiratory and gastrointestinal infections, experts say. Some studies also suggest that breast-fed babies are at lower risk for sudden infant death syndrome and serious chronic diseases later in life, including asthma, diabetes, leukemia and some forms of lymphoma, according to the American Academy of Pediatrics. Research on premature babies has even found that those given breast milk scored higher on I.Q. tests than those who were bottle-fed.

The goal of a government health initiative called Healthy People 2010 is to get half of all mothers to continue at least some breast-feeding until a baby is 6 months old. Though about 70 percent of new mothers start breast-feeding right after childbirth, just over a third are breast-feeding at 6 months and fewer than 20 percent are exclusively breast-feeding by that time, according to the 2004 National Immunization Survey. Breast-feeding increases with education, income and age; black women are less likely to breast-feed, while Hispanics have higher breast-feeding rates.
For women, breast-feeding can be an emotionally charged issue, and a very personal one. Even its most ardent supporters acknowledge that they have made sacrifices.

"It's a whole lifestyle," said Kymberlie Stefanski, a 34-year-old mother of three from Villa Park, Ill., who has not been apart from her children except for one night when she gave birth. "My life revolves around my kids, basically." Ms. Stefanski quit working when her first child was born almost six years ago, nursed that child until she was 4 years old, and is nursing an infant now.
She said she wanted to reduce the risk of breast cancer for herself and for her three daughters, referring to research indicating that extended breast-feeding may reduce the risk for both mother and daughters.

Scientists who study breast milk almost all speak of it in superlatives. Even the International Formula Council, a trade association, acknowledges that breast-feeding "offers specific child and maternal health benefits" and is the "preferred" method of infant feeding. The American Academy of Pediatrics states in its breast-feeding policy that human breast milk is "uniquely superior for infant feeding."

Dr. Haynes, of the Health and Human Services Department, said, "Our message is that breast milk is the gold standard, and anything less than that is inferior."
Formula "is not equivalent," she went on, adding, "Formula is not the gold standard. It's so far from it, it's not even close."

Formula manufacturers say infant formula is modeled on breast milk and emphasize that it is the only safe alternative recommended by pediatricians for mothers who cannot, or choose not to, breast-feed.

But while formula tastes the same way at every feeding, advocates of breast-feeding say, the smells and flavors of human breast milk change from day to day, from morning to evening, influenced by the mother's diet. Many nutritionists believe that exposing an infant to this bouquet of flavors early on may make for less fussy eaters who are more flexible about trying new foods and more likely to eat a healthy, varied diet.

"I think of human milk not just as food, but as a sophisticated and intricate infant support system that has evolved over millions of years to provide the infant with nutrition, protection and components of information," said Dr. E. Stephen Buescher, a professor of pediatrics at Eastern Virginia Medical School in Norfolk, who heads the inflammation section in the school's Center for Pediatric Research.

"It isn't just calories," Dr. Buescher said.

The protection that breast-feeding provides against acute infectious diseases — including meningitis, upper and lower respiratory infections, pneumonia, bowel infections, diarrhea and ear infections — has been among the most extensively studied of its benefits and is well documented, said Dr. Lawrence M. Gartner, chairman of the American Academy of Pediatrics' breast-feeding section.
Breast-fed babies have 50 percent to 95 percent fewer infections than other babies, Dr. Gartner said, adding, "It's pretty dramatic."

One reason for the reduction in the incidence and the severity of infections is the antibodies contained in the mother's milk. "A lot of this has to do with the mother and baby interacting," he explained. "Whatever the baby is exposed to, the mother is exposed to, and the mother will make antibodies within three to four days." The baby absorbs them through breast milk.
Breast milk also protects the baby through other mechanisms. For example, it contains agents that prevent bacteria and viruses from attaching to cells in the baby's body, so the foreign agents are expelled in the stool, Dr. Gartner said.

The protection is not ironclad, so breast-fed babies will often get a mild infection that does not make the baby sick but acts almost like a vaccine. "What we think is that human milk creates an environment where you get your immunity without the cost of an infection, the vomiting and the diarrhea," Dr. Buescher said. "That's a bargain."

Neonatologists are urging the mothers of their tiniest patients to express breast milk because premature and low-birth-weight babies are particularly vulnerable to infections. Studies have found that premature babies who get breast milk are discharged earlier from the hospital and are less likely to develop necrotizing enterocolitis, a potentially deadly disease. Breast milk has also been shown to lift the cognitive development of premature babies, presumably because it contains certain fatty acids that aid brain development.

Experts say it is possible that human breast milk produces permanent changes in the immune system, in a sense "educating" the baby's immune system, Dr. Gartner suggested. That may explain why children who were breast-fed appear to be at lower risk for autoimmune diseases like Crohn's, asthma and juvenile diabetes. Several studies also indicate that breast-fed children are at reduced risk for the cancers lymphoma and leukemia.

Officials with the International Formula Council say there is not enough evidence to prove a relationship between early feeding and serious chronic diseases.
Dr. Myron Peterson, director of medical affairs for Cato Research, a private independent research organization which reviewed the literature on breast-feeding for the council, said that studies have found a link between nursing and health benefits but that they do not prove a causal relationship. "It's like the old statement about the rooster crowing making the sun come up," he said. "If you did an observational study on that, what would you say?" An unpublished report the council commissioned from Cato says "it is not scientifically correct to conclude the lack of exclusive breast-feeding plays a causative role in the development of these diseases."

But scientists are so intrigued about the potential to protect children from juvenile diabetes that a large 10-year multinational study called Trigr (for Trial to Reduce Insulin-dependent diabetes mellitus in the Genetically at Risk) is under way to find out whether breast-feeding protects at-risk children from developing the disease.
And public health officials, excited about mounting evidence suggesting that children who were breast-fed are at lower risk of being obese, have been promoting breast-feeding as a strategy to combat alarming rates of childhood obesity.

The health benefits of breast-feeding may extend to mothers as well. According to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, extended breast-feeding reduces the risk of ovarian cancer and breast cancer. New studies have also found that women who breast-feed face a lower risk of adult-onset or Type 2 diabetes, and they seem to be at lower risk for osteoporosis later in life.

Immediately after childbirth, nursing accelerates healing by reducing the amount of bleeding and causing the uterus to contract more rapidly back to its normal size. Making milk burns up to 500 extra calories a day, so nursing mothers get help shedding extra pounds from pregnancy, experts say, especially if they nurse for an extended period.
Experts say lactation also seems to have a calming effect on the mother, which may be an adaptive mechanism to ease the transition to life with a new baby. Every time a mother nurses, she gets a spike in oxytocin, which may have an antianxiety effect and help promote bonding with the new baby, said Kathryn G. Dewey, a professor of nutrition at the University of California, Davis, and an expert on breast-feeding.

Nursing may even produce a euphoric feeling, she said.

Dr. Michael Kramer, a professor of pediatrics and of epidemiology and biostatistics at McGill University's medical school in Montreal who has been studying the health effects of breast-feeding among infants in Belarus, found a strong protective effect against gastrointestinal illnesses and a lesser protective effect against respiratory infections. Dr. Kramer is still analyzing data on obesity, I.Q., behavior and blood pressure.

"It can't do all of the things that are being claimed for it," Dr. Kramer said, injecting a note of caution into the debate. "But it probably does some of them."

Tarin's Birthday!!!!!!!!

Today is my sweet Tarin's birthday! Enjoy his birth story! :) Pictures of his party will follow....after we have the party this afternoon!

Kellen was about 6 1/2 months old when I found out I was expecting another baby! Ethan was 3 so it was kinda overwhelming to realize I would have 3 kids under 3 years old. However, Josiah and I were very excited and felt quite blessed by the Lord for such a wonderful gift.

Tarin's pregnancy was....different than my others. First, I had no real due date. I had not had any cycle since before I had Kellen so there was little to go by in that respect. We declined an ultrasound because of the medical problems it can cause with the baby (another post for another day!)....so we decided to wing it altogether. The best we could determine....mid May.
Second............my two older boys both got purtussis (whopping cough) when I was about 12 weeks along with Tarin; so I was obviously concerned with passing it to the baby. The doc assured me that would not happen, but I was still wary. (the whopping cough was LOOOOONG gone by the time Tarin was born....so the doc was right!).

I nursed Kell through the pregnancy (I am a big extended nursing fan so I did not want Kell to miss out on the awesome benefits of nursing even if I was preg again). He did wean himself around month 7 of being pregnant....when he turned 1 year. I remember being at a friends home (Kerri!) at some point in May....chasing Kell around her house and watching Ethan play and thinking...."oh my gosh. HOW will I do this with a little newborn?!" Kell and the new baby would be about 15 months apart. Kell was barely walking, not potty trained and a wild little guy. :) Lord, help me!

The other funny thing about Tarin's pregnancy was that I was 100%....no....150% positive that the baby was a girl. No reason other than my intuition (which we all now know is...faulty). In fact, at his birth, all I had prepared was purple blankets and floral hats for the baby right after the birth. I was just certain "it" was a girl.

Mid may came..................and went. Nothing. Nada. LOTS of contractions.....none that progressed into labor.
Family and friends starting commenting on the massive size I had become. My belly measured 5 cm LARGER that I should have measured. Strangers asked if I was carrying twins. (and after I hit them I SAT on them)....just kidding. :)
I was beginning to feel that "I will be pregnant forever" feeling......and it lasted for 3 more weeks!
Had I been planning a hospital birth I would have been induced around middle of May, just based on my belly measurements alone. (had that happened I would have birthed a 3 week premature baby). Thankfully, my midwife has enough knowledge, experience and wisdom to monitor the baby and just wait and see.
My Grandparents drove over from Texas for the birth....stayed almost 2 weeks...and drove home! AH! This baby was never coming out!

Oh, but he waaaasssssss. God had a plan. He knit Tarin in my womb....He has numbered Tarins' days and knows EXACTLY when Tarin should be born.

My water staring a small leak in the night of the 6th (really, the morning of the 7th) about 2 a.m. As Tarin now says, "Yeah Baby! That's what I talkin about!" I got up and showered then tried to go back to bed. I knew I had a job to do and I wanted all the rest I could get. Later that morning my mom came over and got Ethan and Kellen. We set up the birth pool then Josiah and I went out.....to eat! Roadhouse Grill, baby! It is amazing the FAST service you get when the waitress knows your in labor and is afraid she will deliver that baby on the table. Ummm.....I had a delicious salad, chicken and some of their very high-fat bread....and a ton of water. After lunch we walked around Old Navy....looking at baby clothes (girl, of course). My contraction were sporadic and not intense at all. About 10 minutes apart and painless.
The rest of the day is kinda a blurrrrrr.....I think we went and ate at moms' house for dinner and then Josiah and I went back home. We had a few hours to ourselves before mom brought the boys home and put them to bed.....so we turned on Natalie Cole and danced in the living room. The candlelight and music made it so romantic! I really enjoyed that time I had with Josiah.
Around 11p.m. Claudia came by to se how things were going. My contractions had picked up a bit, but I knew I still had a while to go. Claudia listened to the baby...took vitals and then sat with us to chat. I ate an organic peach yogurt and remember thinking how delicious it was. I had to convince Claudia to go home and I would call when things got more serious. Heck, I was talking and laughing! I still had a while. Reluctantly, Claudia went home to get some sleep. I decided that I should lay down while I still could (I hate laying down in labor....but it was not to intense yet, so I could still be comfortable in bed). Josiah and I went upstairs and I got to sleep in between contractions. After a few hours I noticed that the contractions were getting much closer together and lasting over a minute. I was happy that things were finally picking up! I think it was around 2:30 a.m. or 3:00 a.m. that Josiah called Claudia to come back over. Debbie, her midwife partner, came with her. We also had invited my friend Tracy to video and Kerri to take pictures. My mom was there as well for the kids (who were sound asleep) and pool upkeep as well as moral support. I came downstairs and Claudia checked the baby and then me....I was 7 cm! Woo Hoo! I still felt like I had a while to go....for some reason I "knew" it would be a while longer before we saw this baby. I turned on 3rd Day Worship Album and settled into a pattern of labordancing, squatting, sitting on the birth ball and walking through contractions. I ate an entire apple (I needed the energy for stamina) and drank SO much water.

This went on for hours and hours and hours. The CD I had on repeated itself SO may times! I finally turned it off. My candles were burning out....and daylight was peaking through the windows. I had gotten in the pool at some point to get a little rest but I got out again a little while later. (the birthpool was in my living room floor).

At around 6:50 a.m. Claudia checked and I was still 7-8 cm. I was really tired and just wanted the kid OUT. Up till then labor had been enjoyable and fun, but now I was ready to call it a day and go to sleep! Claudia asked me if I was ready to birth. I said, OF COURSE I was. I could not pull the wool over her eyes...she knew I was mentally not "there" yet. I was stressed about many things....finances, 3 kids under 3 years, WHERE the baby would sleep....etc. I was holding onto "easiness" for as long as I could! I took a few minutes and decided that I was indeed ready to face life...and I was ready to have a new baby. About 2 contractions later I began pushing. At first I laid on the couch to push (why? no idea. I HATED it) and while I ate my banana I decided I wanted to jump in the pool. I got in the water and it was SOOOO nice. I relaxed and allowed my body to push my baby down. I remember that in between pushing contractions all I wanted was COLD water...and lots of it. At some point I drank all the water in my water bottle and it irritated me that "they" could not even keep my water bottle full! I was having a baby! How hard is it to keep water there for me?! I threw my water bottle across the room and demanded more NOW. Needless to say, the baby came very soon after that. :)

I pushed a total of 11 minutes. Josiah was not able to catch the baby this time because he had poison ivy all down his arms. :( He sat behind me, though, holding me up in a flowing/squat in the pool. I remember when Claudia said, "Tiff, the head is born." I was amazed! I reached down and felt his soft little head...his ears, his eyes, nose and mouth. Oh how sweet! Oh how precious! He was so soft! I also realized as I was touching his head that he did not rotate in the manner most babies rotate to allow the shoulders to be born. (by this time I had done over 100 births and knew what was going on). I mentioned this to Claudia (as if she did not already know!) and she told me that it was fine, just stay very loose on my next push and hold my squat. So, the next push, I stayed very loose and she reached a finger under his shoulder and he flew out!
(Remember, at this point I still think this is a girl).

I cried with thankfulness to the Lord and kept saying, "Thank you Jesus for my baby!" He was so very cute! He did not cry much....he just looked around at Josiah and I. I sat in the pool for several minutes talking to the baby before I thought to even look and see what kind of baby we had. I peaked under the towel and started laughing hysterically. It was a boy!!!!!!!!!! I was shocked and so surprised....it was a wonderful moment in my life that I will never forget. What a blessing! We now had 3 sons!

After a few hours just relaxing with our new son I decided I wanted some food and a shower. After that was accomplished Claudia and Debbie did the newborn exam. This baby was a chunk....10 pounds and 8 ounces!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And that was the beginning of a beautiful relationship we have with our Tarin Josiah.
Thank you Lord for blessing our family with such a sweet, sensitive, independent, funny, beautiful little boy :)

Did I mention that I felt so good the next day that I was up cleaning the bathroom? Yes, I got yelled at for that one :)

C Section artwork

Below is a link to a site made by a mom who had 2 C sections...the last one she is very upset about a realizes her mistake. The artwork on the site is quite graphic yet very powerful....she is able to convey thoughts/feelings that other moms have told me about but I never did "grasp" until I saw these pictures. Click on the first picture to enter the site.
Anyway, not something the kiddies will enjoy...and have your tissues ready.
I cannot help but think of my mom when I see these.....she also had 2 C sections and hated it....especially the 2nd one. I grew up seeing her scar and always saying I never wanted one.....

http://www.cesarean-art.com/

How Would YOU Respond?????

How would you respond in these situations?


1. A preacher and his wife are very, very poor. They already have 14 kids. Now she finds out she’s pregnant with the 15th. They’re living in tremendous poverty. Considering their poverty and the excessive world population, would you consider recommending she get an abortion?


2. The father is sick with sniffles, the mother has TB. Of their four children, the first is blind, the second has died, the third is deaf, the fourth has TB. She finds she’s pregnant again. Given this extreme situation, would you consider recommending abortion?


3. A white man raped a 13-year-old black girl and she’s now pregnant. If you were her parents, would you consider recommending abortion?


4. A teenage girl is pregnant. She’s not married. Her fiancé is not the father of the baby, and he’s upset. Would you recommend abortion?





In the first case, you would have killed John Wesley, one of the great evangelists in the 19th century. In the second case, you would have killed Beethoven. In the third case, you would have killed Ethel Waters, the great black gospel singer. If you said yes to the fourth case, you would have declared the murder of Jesus Christ!




God is the author of life, and He has givenevery single individual supreme value. Each life—whether inside or outside the womb—should therefore be valued by us. God knows the plans He has for each individual and has written in His book all the days ordained for us before one of them came to be. When we presume to know better than God who should be given life, we are putting ourselves in the place of God and are guilty of idolatry.

How Would YOU Respond?????

How would you respond in these situations?


1. A preacher and his wife are very, very poor. They already have 14 kids. Now she finds out she’s pregnant with the 15th. They’re living in tremendous poverty. Considering their poverty and the excessive world population, would you consider recommending she get an abortion?


2. The father is sick with sniffles, the mother has TB. Of their four children, the first is blind, the second has died, the third is deaf, the fourth has TB. She finds she’s pregnant again. Given this extreme situation, would you consider recommending abortion?


3. A white man raped a 13-year-old black girl and she’s now pregnant. If you were her parents, would you consider recommending abortion?


4. A teenage girl is pregnant. She’s not married. Her fiancé is not the father of the baby, and he’s upset. Would you recommend abortion?





In the first case, you would have killed John Wesley, one of the great evangelists in the 19th century. In the second case, you would have killed Beethoven. In the third case, you would have killed Ethel Waters, the great black gospel singer. If you said yes to the fourth case, you would have declared the murder of Jesus Christ!




God is the author of life, and He has givenevery single individual supreme value. Each life—whether inside or outside the womb—should therefore be valued by us. God knows the plans He has for each individual and has written in His book all the days ordained for us before one of them came to be. When we presume to know better than God who should be given life, we are putting ourselves in the place of God and are guilty of idolatry.

Living Will

A man and his wife were sitting in the living room and he said to her,
"Just so you know, I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent
on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull
the plug."





His wife got up, unplugged the TV and threw out all of his beer.

New Store!!!

A New Husbands Store Opens Up

A store that sells new husbands has just opened in New York City, where
a woman may go to choose a husband. Among the instructions at the
entrance is a description of how the store operates.

You may visit the store ONLY ONCE! There are six floors and the
attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There
is, however, a catch: you may choose any man from a particular floor, or
you may choose to go up a floor, but you cannot go back down except to
exit the building!

So, a woman goes to the Husband Store to find a husband.

On the first floor the sign on the door reads:
Floor 1
* These men have jobs.

She goes to the second floor where the sign reads:

Floor 2
* These men have jobs and love kids.

Then she goes to the third floor where the sign reads:

Floor 3
* These men have jobs, love kids, and are extremely good
looking.

Wow," she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going.
She goes up to the fourth floor and the sign reads:

Floor 4
* These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous
and help with the housework.
Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it"

Still, she goes to the fifth floor and the sign reads: .

Floor 5
* These men have jobs, love kids, are drop-dead gorgeous,
helps with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak.

She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign
reads:

Floor 6
* You are visitor 31,456,012 to this floor. There are no men on this floor.

This floor exists solely as proof that women are impossible to please.

Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store.

Oops

Reason 3,872 I have my babies at home ;)
This is a true story...funny now!




A man comes into the ER and yells, "My wife's going to have her baby in the cab!" I grabbed my stuff, rushed out to the cab, lifted the lady's dress, and began to take off her underwear. Suddenly I noticed that there were several cabs, and I was in the wrong one. --Dr. Mark MacDonald, San Antonio, TX

My Trip To Mexico

David M. Bresnahan
April 1, 2006
NewsWithViews.com

Dear President Bush:

I'm about to plan a little trip with my family and extended family,and I would like to ask you to assist me. I'm going to walk across the border from the U.S. into Mexico and I need to make a few arrangements. I know you can help with this.

I plan to skip all the legal stuff like visas, passports, immigration quotas and laws. I'm sure they handle those things the same way you do here. So, would you mind telling your buddy, President Vicente Fox, that I'm on my way over? Please let him know that I will be expecting the following:

1. Free medical care for my entire family.
2. English-speaking government bureaucrats for all services I might need, whether I use them or not.
3. All government forms need to be printed in English.
4. I want my kids to be taught by English-speaking teachers.
5. Schools need to include classes on American culture and history.
6. I want my kids to see the American flag flying on the top of the flag pole at their school with the Mexican flag flying lower down.
7. Please plan to feed my kids at school for both breakfast and lunch.
8. I will need a local Mexican driver's license so I can get easy access to government services.
9. I do not plan to have any car insurance, and I won't make any effort to learn local traffic laws.
10. In case one of the Mexican police officers does not get the memo from Pres. Fox to leave me alone, please be sure that all police officers speak English.
11. I plan to fly the U.S. flag from my house top, put flag decals on my car, and have a gigantic celebration on July 4th. I do not want any complaints or negative comments from the locals.
12. I would also like to have a nice job without paying any taxes, and don't enforce any labor laws or tax laws.
13. Please tell all the people in the country to be extremely nice and never say a critical word about me, or about the strain I might place on their paychecks since their taxes will fund all of my requests.

I know this is an easy request because you already do all these things for all the people who come to the U.S. from Mexico. I am sure that Pres. Fox won't mind returning the favor if you ask him nicely. However, if he gives you any trouble, just invite him to go quail hunting with your V.P.

Thank you so much for your kind help.

Sincerely,

David M. Bresnahan

The Plane Trip

Three old black ladies were preparing for their
first plane flight.

The first lady said, "I don't know bout y'all, but
I'm gonna wear me some hot pink panties on dis
flight."

"Why you gonna wear dat?" the other two asked.

The first replied, "Cause, if dat plane goes down
and I'm out dere laying butt-up in a corn field, dey
gonna find me first."

The second lady says, "Well, I'm gonna wear me some
fluorescent orange
panties."

"Why you gonna wear dem?" the others asked.

The second lady answered: "Cause if dat plane goes
down and I'm floating
butt-up in the ocean, dey can see me first."

The third old lady says, "Well, I'm not going to
wear any panties at all."

"What, no panties?!" the others said in disbelief.

"Dat's right," says the third lady. "I'm not wearing
any panties, cause if dat plane goes down, the first
thing they always looks for is da black box."

My Last Post......

I'm happy to say this will be my last post.

Things have been a bit tough today and life is getting
shorter and shorter every day. I want to take time and
smell the roses. So I am going to quit posting jokes....
and travel full time with a biker gang to see the country
and enjoy life while I still can. Don't worry about me - they
Are all like really nice people. It has been nice posting for
you!!!!!!!!!!!!

Below is a picture of my new biker gang......see y'all later! :)